🔗 Share this article

“Well, it’s rather brutal here. We’re advising all of our clients to put everything they’ve got into preserved goods and firearms.” That bit of sage advice comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, articulate, spectacled member of the slimy Gremlin horde that overruns Manhattan’s ultra-modern Clamp Tower skyscraper in director Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. At first glance, it’s simply an financial suggestion from one monster to another. Yet, oddly enough, it’s also remarkably sound life guidance. Honestly, listen to my reasoning.

When things go bad, the worst thing you can do is approach matters with excessive gravity. The Brain Gremlin understands this. In fact, a large portion of the fang-bearing creatures that inhabit Dante’s chaotic 1990 feature (possibly his finest) possess the same sly, self-aware comic sensibility regarding the indistinct border separating everyday life and absolute bedlam. It’s one element of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that maintains my loyalty – and the older I get, it’s the message that resonates the most.

A Childhood Fascination

Understandably, my attachment to this movie didn’t start on such an deeply thoughtful note. Growing up, we possessed merely a few well-worn videocassettes at home. Included within that collection were Gremlins and its second chapter, the latter housed in a chunky ex-rental box probably bought from an independent video outlet and sporting snarling creatures on its tattered front. I was immediately enamoured and these films quickly proceeded inserting themselves inside my tiny, impressionable mind. Henceforth, they became an practically routine part of my youthful watching schedule.

Dante’s original usually receives all the accolades, thanks largely to its status as a semi-scary seasonal fave – and let me be clear, I’ve watched Gremlins more times than I can count. However, its successor rarely gets the same level of lofty appreciation, which feels a travesty. As a kid, I’d always seize the chance to watch Gremlins 2. During bright summer vacations, I’d retreat into the house and pop it in. When I got my own TV-VHS combo unit, it continued playing looped in my bedroom. With repetition, it became deeply rooted in my psyche. If my parents detected this preoccupation, they appeared unbothered.

Deeper Discoveries and Pop-Culture Nuggets

As I matured, new understandings rewarded repeat viewings, amplifying the pleasure of watching little green monsters joyously wreck a New York high-rise. I learned the ahead-of-its-time real estate tycoon and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was modeled closely on future president Donald Trump, with his auburn-haired worker Marla (Haviland Morris) alluding to his one-time partner Marla Maples. Luckily, Clamp possesses greater compassion than his actual-world equivalent.

The “doomsday” video Clamp plays during the height of creature carnage? I discovered it was modeled after a genuine “Doomsday” video created by the CNN boss Ted Turner in case the world truly faced apocalypse. I noticed how Dante went out of his way to film varying versions of a meta sequence where Gremlins hijack the actual feature in progress. A version for theaters, a separate one for tape and broadcast, each delivering a smirking slice of fourth-wall-breaking cultural alchemy ahead of its time.

A Lasting Influence

While it was creature designer Rick Baker’s fantastically vile creatures that caught my eye as a child, this hidden treasure held my interest as an adult. In time, I even conversed with Dante about it myself and he had no reservations revealing to me he made the movie with the express purpose of ridiculing those who loved its absurd-yet-genuine predecessor and wanted more. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he gleefully confessed. This cartoonish insubordination and determination to not take his sequel as seriously as his Warner Bros bosses clearly wanted him to, only made me love it even more.

When I experienced a unexpected loss in the family earlier this year, I was surprised to find that, during my most profound sorrow, all I felt compelled to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Weird, right? Possibly not. The soothing reminiscence it provided was needed to dilute my mind’s mourning mire – but the perspectives it had imparted to me as an adult were similarly beneficial.

Like Gremlins running amok in a genetics laboratory, there’s some things in life you just can’t control. Dante is aware of it. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to emulate them: accept the turmoil, commit your entire being into preserved goods and firearms and try not to take things too seriously.

It’s strong life advice from a most improbable origin – and it’s the reason Gremlins 2: The New Batch will always be my go-to cinematic solace.